For most of 2009, I was in a relationship with someone I really cared about. Actually, I was in love with her. By the end of 2009 though, our relationship had strained for various reasons, and in the end, it all ended, and not on the best of terms.
I was devastated. I’m the kind of person who puts my heart and soul into the things and people that I care about, and I always wear my heart on my sleeve. Putting myself completely out there and then having my world completely crushed in an instant was pretty devastating. It was the first time I ever really experienced something like that. It made me physically sick. I ended up losing close to some 30 pounds in a matter of a few weeks because I wouldn’t eat.
My entire mental state essentially broke down. For the second time in my life, I entered into a period of depression and collapsed into a hole of anger, anxiety, and frustration.
As it turned out, that experience went on to become the single most important turning point of my life. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m so grateful for the fact that I broke down, collapsed, and nearly imploded in on myself. Why?
It was the first time in my life that I actually consciously acknowledged that I was hitting a real breaking point……and shortly after, I reached a point where I was happy it was happening.
You might be asking yourself, “How in the world could hitting a breaking point possibly be a good thing? Are you fucking crazy or something?”
Maybe I am a little crazy. But, let me explain my craziness for you. Here’s why hitting a really deep, dark, depressing breaking point is something you should be happy about.
-ACKNOWLEDGING A BREAKING POINT MEANS YOU REALIZE SOMETHING ISN’T RIGHT IN YOUR LIFE
By acknowledging the fact that you’ve hit a low breaking point, you’ve done yourself a huge favor by recognizing the fact that things aren’t right in your life. The experience you’re going through is showing you that you are bottoming out. And, importantly, there’s absolutely no reason to freak out or feel helpless. Realizing and accepting the fact that you’ve broken down is a wonderful first step. You’ve shown the strength to face your breaking point and realize that things need to be realigned. Take pride in that and give yourself the credit you deserve for doing so.
-A BREAKING POINT IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU TO MAKE POSITIVE CHANGES
Now that you’ve acknowledged you’ve hit a breaking point, sit down with yourself and give yourself an honest evaluation of what you need to change in your life in order to grow, improve, and move forward. My own person experience showed me that I needed to make some changes in the following areas:
Mindset – I didn’t have good enough control of my own mind. I needed to be the master of my thoughts and shape my mindset into a one that was positive, determined, and empowering instead of letting my mind take over and do whatever it wanted.
Daily Habits – I needed to get myself a better daily routine that consisted of habits which would allow me to be more productive, successful, and fulfilled.
Weaknesses – I had some glaring personal weaknesses about myself that were affecting my ability to reach my real potential, and were shown to need major adjustment or complete elimination.
The important thing is to not criticize yourself, beat yourself up, or be ridiculously hard on yourself about it. Remember, there’s a huge difference between being hard on yourself and being honest with yourself. Just being honest doesn’t require you to beat yourself up. As long as you’re being honest about what you need to improve on about yourself and your life, you can be encouraged about the future because it WILL get better from there.
-PUSHING THROUGH YOUR BREAKING POINT AND MAKING POSITIVE CHANGES MAKES YOU A STRONGER AND MORE EXPERIENCED PERSON
Life will always be filled with moments that suck. It’s an inevitable and unavoidable aspect of being human and living. But, these breaking points bring about the golden opportunity for us to evaluate ourselves so that we can make positive changes that will improve who we are and get us closer to maximizing our potential. And, by experiencing these breaking points and pushing through them, you’ll become experienced at just how to handle them, and will be even better equipped to do so should you reach another breaking point in your life at some point. You won’t need to fear the breaking points anymore.
In the end, the experience ends up not being a Breaking Point, but a Changing Point.
The Grand Canyon is the result of thousands upon thousands of years of water breaking down the surrounding rock. By breaking down the rock, the water shaped one of the most beautiful landscapes in the world.
Every single experience we go through in life has no inherent meaning. The only meaning an experience has is the one we decide to attach to it.
There are no breaking points. There’s only CHANGING POINTS.
And, Changing Points are always something to embrace and be grateful for.
Embrace your Changing Point and take advantage of it. If you do, you’ll be taking one more step towards fulfilling your full potential and becoming all you can possibly be.